Ahhh... I am doing a happy dance today, and not just because it's Friday! Today we officially BACK with the fourth installment of the Women Who Inspire series, following a holiday season hiatus. Not only are we back, but we're beginning the 2019 series with a fabulous feature about a fabulous woman.

Meet Rosie!

Rosie is one of those people who you meet and can instantly feel her positive energy. She is smart, kind, caring, passionate, and damn hardworking. Rosie and I grew up in the same town and went to the same high school, though we graduated at different times, and now we work in the same field -- and we both love writing! Several years ago, she lost her mom and she shares how that loss shaped her, plus encouraging words that will resonate with anyone who has lost someone they love. Below she talks about her greatest accomplishments, dreams, and challenges and why "the sky is the limit."

1. Let's start with the basics! Tell us a little bit about yourself -- where you call home, what you do for a living. 

I live in Berks County, PA. I am the daughter of two Italian immigrants. I am a full-time proofreader for an advertising magazine and a freelance writer. 

 2. How did you end up in the field you're currently in? What has your career path looked like thus far? 

 Since I was child, my passions included reading and writing. I loved writing little stories and putting little books together. I was a very curious little girl. I was and still am fascinated with acquiring knowledge. In school, I did everything I could to fulfill my passion, which included writing and then being an editor of my high school and college newspapers and then interning at three different newspaper publications and a local television station. 

After graduating from Elizabethtown College in 2006, I worked as a general assignment reporter for a small weekly newspaper in Elizabethtown, where I covered everything except sports. I covered municipal and school board meetings, crime and elections. I also wrote feature stories like business openings, town events, personality profiles, student achievements, etc. I also answered phones and typed up press releases, engagement/wedding announcements, and obituaries to be placed in the paper. I was also responsible for a weekly column called “Word on the Street,” where I would rove the town to capture residents’ opinions on a variety of topics and take their pictures. 

I initially wanted to work a full-time job and attend graduate school at the same time, but plans fell through when I got laid off in February 2009. A few months later, I worked as a receptionist at an insurance agency where I learned a lot about customer service. Some of the great things about that job were that I used my Italian and Spanish linguistic skills for customers who didn’t speak English very well and produced informational kits and promotional materials for prospective clients. Public relations appealed to me at that time. 

In the summer of 2009, I decided to do volunteer advocacy work with the American Cancer Society. I became involved with now-defunct Relay For Life of Elizabethtown. I was named publicity chair, where I wrote press releases, designed the newsletters and posters, and promoted our events via social media. In the next year, I was the event chair, where I oversaw the activities, promotions, recruitment, and events. When I joined the planning committee, our Relays were considered one of smaller events in Lancaster County. Thanks to the dedicated American Cancer Society staff partner, committee members and participants, our event grew each year. We changed our name to RFL of Western Lancaster County to include participants from the Bainbridge, Rheems, Mount Joy, Marietta, and Maytown communities. We also made great strides by reaching our fundraising goals and being recognized for our marketing and promotional efforts. Being involved with Relay was a rewarding experience. I have lost family members to cancer, and I wanted to do my part, though small, to help fight a cure. My father is a 17-year cancer survivor. I met some really incredible survivors and caregivers, and through my marketing tactics, I was able to share their stories. 

I was also a public relations coordinator for Pennwriters, a non-profit organization that helps writers of all levels improve on their craft. I promoted its seminars, online classes, workshops, and writer’s conferences via social media and email blasts. I got to go to writer’s conferences where I was introduced to writers, literary agents and editors and also attended workshops. I missed writing human-interest stories so I decided to some freelance writing for different publications in Lancaster and Berks counties for a while. I also continued to work on my manuscripts. 

With the intention of getting a feel for the classroom again, I enrolled in a 1-year digital print design certificate program at the Pennsylvania College of Art & Design. I took classes in typography, Adobe Illustrator, Photoshop and InDesign. It was a great introduction to balancing (volunteer) work and school. I received my certificate in 2011. While juggling writing, volunteer work and school, I got a nighttime job as an image researcher at my current workplace, where I researched image requests from sales representatives, account service coordinators and artists. I worked the night shift for about 4 years. 

Afterwards, I switched shifts and moved to the proofreading department, which is where I’m at today! 

 3. You are currently a graduate student. Tell us what you're studying and what you hope to do with your new degree. 

 I actually graduated in September 2018. I obtained a master’s degree in publishing from Rosemont College. I’d like to work for a publishing company in some editorial capacity, but I enjoy doing what I do right now. Getting a master’s degree was a dream come true, and I wouldn’t rule out getting another one in the future. Maybe a Master in Fine Arts and/or a doctorate. The sky is the limit. Though Dr. Rosie has a nice ring to it! ;) 

 4. How do you manage attending graduate school while working full time? What keeps you motivated? 

 Lots of caffeine! :) Seriously though, there are two things. First, I could not have accomplished this without the support of my family, friends, professors, and co-workers. Going to school while working full time is not an easy task. Thankfully, those people who believed in me gave me the fuel to keep going through their words of encouragement. I will be forever grateful for their love and support. Second, I’m a very driven person. Whenever I set a goal, I follow it through no matter how long it takes. Some people yearn for a master’s degree in order to get a more lucrative, professional opportunity. For me, it’s more personal. All my life I have felt that I needed to work harder than everyone else because I wanted to prove to not just to others but also to myself that I can achieve great things, and getting a master’s degree is one of them. I knew that the process was going to be challenging. I have had to make some sacrifices, but I learned that if you want something so badly, the sacrifices and hard work would be worth it in the end. 

There are times when life throws you unexpected curveballs that knock you down and test your strength. That happened to me twice during the past five years: my mother’s death and my car accident. Both times I thought about quitting because I felt I just could not handle the stress and the pain any longer or it was a sign that I was not good enough. I am so glad I didn’t give up. It’s the first time in my life that I am proud of myself. 

 5. You're a writer -- are you working on anything right now? What would be your dream-come-true, writing-wise? 

 I have several manuscripts started, but the one I am intensely working on is a young adult novel. Former First Lady Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis, who was a book editor later in her life, once said, “If you produce one book, you will have done something wonderful in your life.” That has always been my dream as a writer: to produce one book. Sounds practical, but it’s a difficult task. I’d love to be on The New York Times Bestsellers List, but in order to do that I have to write a good book. 

 6. You're also an avid reader! What is the best book you've ever read, and what's the best book you've read in the past year?

 I have not read the best book yet because I’m still writing it! ;) I will say that my favorite book thus far is Elena Ferrante’s My Brilliant Friend. It is the first of four books in her Neapolitan series. I have read it three times, and it is breathtakingly amazing! The series chronicles the lives of two girls named Elena Greco and Lila Cerullo who are best friends trying to create lives for themselves from their violent, poor neighborhood on the outskirts of Naples, Italy. They’re both very smart, but they chart a different path in life, as they get older. The story is so richly narrated and beautifully written, and Ferrante’s prose is simple and straightforward with a touch of complexity. I love how she makes her characters seem so real and relatable, even though the story is set post-WWII. The TV adaptation of the book is excellent! 

 7. You lost your mom a few years ago. What has the grieving process taught you? 

 The main lesson it has taught me is that you never stop grieving. You never get over the death of a close loved one, despite what some people might say. You learn to live with it for the rest of your life. Life is precious, and we are here on a journey. It should not be taken for granted. Grief has also helped me see people’s true colors and has allowed me to set boundaries on relationships with certain people. I have learned who are my true supporters and surround myself with them, thus becoming a different person. I also learned that everyone grieves differently, and it’s important to be respectful to his or her process. It’s ok to allow yourself to just be. Being strong doesn’t mean you have to withhold yourself from being emotional. Crying doesn’t make you weak. You’ll go through the 5 steps of grief more times than you realize, and you’ll probably won’t follow them in order. Sometimes, you’ll be in one step for a long period of time. 

I recently saw a quote on social media that speaks so truthfully about the definition of grief. 

"Grief, I’ve learned is really just love. It’s all the love you want to give, but cannot. All that unspent love gathers up in the corners of your eyes, the lump in your throat, and in that hollow part of your chest. Grief is just love with no place to go.” – Jamie Anderson

 That’s exactly how to describe my grief for my mother. She died of a stroke. Even though she had a slew of health problems and was in the hospital for a couple of weeks before she passed, I never thought that I would have to say goodbye to her so soon.

 Most recently, one of my friends lost her mother unexpectedly. Her mother was around the same age as my mother when she died. My friend’s relationship with her mother paralleled my relationship with mine. They were each other’s absolute best friends. They saw each other every day and spoke to each other on the phone 3-4 times a day. Hearing about her mother’s passing opened up old wounds. It broke my heart because I understood the emotions that my friend was feeling: pain, confusion, anger, anxiety, and fear. She said to me that she wasn’t sure how she was going to live without her mother’s presence, warm embrace, words of encouragement and wisdom, calming comfort and grace. I empathized with her so much. I am trying to help her in any way that I can so that she doesn’t feel like she is alone. 

No matter how prepared you are to say goodbye to someone so close to you, you’re never prepared enough when the time comes. My mother promised me that she would not leave me. When she died, half of my heart died, too. So to have her presence one day and then be taken away from me the next is devastating. I remember holding her hand when she took her last breath. My final minutes with her were emotional and special at the same time. Losing my mother was the most painful experience in my life. I didn’t know how I was going to move on. 

 We live in a society where taking care of one’s self is the utmost priority. My mother’s priority in life was taking care of others. She always put herself on the back-burner. She was the most selfless woman I’ve ever met. She had a heart of gold and was extremely loyal to her family and friends. She was a devoted wife, mother, daughter, daughter-in-law, sister, aunt, and friend. A lot of people remember her for her superb cooking skills, but she was so much more than that. She was funny, feisty, and a perfectionist. She was a great seamstress. My mother and I were like sisters. We finished each other’s sentences. Her love and her hugs always gave me strength. She was the one who gave me the love of storytelling and encouraged me to read books and become a writer. When I was a child, she would always tell me stories about her childhood in Sicily, the people in her hometown, her parents whom I’d never met, and life when she first came to America. She told these stories in such a way that it was magical. I have always wanted to write stories that have the same effect on others as her stories had on me. 

Her final words to me were what we said to each other every day: I love you. She always called me “gioia mia,” which in Italian means my joy. She, along with my dad, succeeded in making my life as normal as possible. My mother always drilled into me to be strong because she knew that my life was going to be difficult so my emotional strength was tested from the day my mother died to the day of her funeral. I allowed myself to hide my grief because I needed to be strong for my father, who was also devastated. I needed to be there for him. I delivered the eulogy without shedding a tear. To this day, I don’t know how I did it. It was the most difficult thing I ever had to do, but my mission that day was to make my mother proud of me. 

 I am not ashamed to admit that I still grieve for my mother. However, I grieve in a different way than how I did almost 6 years ago. I don’t cry as much as I used to, but that doesn’t mean I don’t miss her every day. I miss her voice, her words of wisdom, and her hugs. She is still the first person I think about when I wake up in the morning and the last person I think about when I go to bed. She comes in my dreams from time to time. Sometimes I wake up smiling, and sometimes I cry. I learned that I could still have a relationship with my mother, just in a different way. When I go to the cemetery, I talk to her. It’s kind of therapeutic. The day before my mother passed away, I saw a beautiful rainbow outside her hospital window. It was definitely a sign. Since then, every time I see a rainbow, I smile because I know she’s watching me. Not only was she my mother, my absolute best friend, my sister, my confidante, and my backbone, but she’s now my guardian angel. I always wonder what she would think of me today. I will never understand God’s plan to take my mother so soon. But when it’s time for me to enter Heaven, I know that she will welcome me with open arms and then God and I will have a long talk. In the meantime, I will continue live on as my mother’s legacy. 

 8. What would you consider to be the biggest challenge in your life, and how have you worked to overcome it (or make peace with it)? 

 When people see me, it’s easy to figure out the biggest challenge in my life. I have achondroplasia, a common type of dwarfism. It took me a very long time to make peace with it. The physical aspect of my disability wasn’t as painful for me as the emotional aspect. Even though my life is pretty normal, I was a victim of stares and bullying. I've been called midget, which, to me, is as offensive as saying the N-word to an African-American and the C-word to a woman. 

In my senior year in high school, I was forced to dress up like a leprechaun and walk around the halls singing the Lucky Charms cereal jingle everytime students "tap" my head (it was more like hitting and slamming). No matter how much I tried to blend in, there were people who tried to make me stand out in a way that I felt uncomfortable. I had been told that I should date just "little people" or go to a "little people" support group because that would help me feel better. It made me feel worse because I felt like I was being segregated by society. I was depressed and eventually developed suicidal thoughts. If the world was going to be that cruel to me for the rest of my life, then I had enough. I didn’t want to live in a world anymore where people made me feel so different. But I realized that I could not do that to my parents. It was unfair to them since they gave me the gift of life. 

 I compare my disability to kintsukuroi, a Japanese art of repaired broken pottery bowl that is put together by lacquer resin laced with gold or silver. Kintsukuroi has a fundamental, deep, philosophical meaning. Some people may believe that the broken cracks and seams represent the flaws and are part of the object’s design. Others may look at the pottery as a whole and think that it is most beautiful object having gone through the journey of being broken and repaired, similar to my past experience. The proof of the bowl’s fragility and its resilience is what makes it beautiful. 

 I’ll never forget my dad’s signature lecture to me. He would ask me if I have two eyes, two legs, two arms, two ears, etc. Each time, I would say yes. When he was finished, he then asked me, “What the hell is wrong with you?” I understood his point. There is nothing wrong with me because I am perfect in his eyes. We are all born differently. We’re not born in perfect form. We fuss about our imperfections, but it is our imperfections that make us the most beautiful. We have to make the most out of what we are born with. I may have short, bowed legs and walk funny, but I can still walk. I may have short arms and pudgy hands, but I can still utilize them. When I need help, I will ask for it. 

 A few months ago, a guy asked me why I allow myself to be labeled a “Little Person” or a “Midget” or “Dwarf.” I interrupted him by saying that I detest those labels and that they are not in my vocabulary. It is NOT I who allow myself to be called those names. It is society that does, and I can only control what I think of myself, not what other people think of me. I wish we lived in a world where labels didn’t exist. I am more than just a walking billboard of my disability because it only represents 1/16th of who I am. I am also a woman, a daughter, a niece, a cousin, an “auntie”, a co-worker, a lover, and a friend. I am well educated, a writer, an avid reader, a proofreader, a sports fan, an Italian-American, a multi-lingual, and a Catholic. I am, above all else, normal and able. 

 9. What's something people might be surprised to learn about you? 

 I haven’t read the Harry Potter series yet. 

 10. What would an ideal day look like for you, from start to finish? 

 An ideal day for me would have to consist of either curling up with a good book and/or writing OR binge-watching on a few of my favorite shows OR spending quality time with my dad OR catching up and laughing the blues away with friends or family OR giving copious amounts of hugs to those who are in need of comfort, love and strength.

The sky is, indeed, the limit. Thank you so much for sharing your amazing perspective with us, Rosie! 

WOMEN WHO INSPIRE: MEET KELLY

Welcome, friends! I'm so thrilled you're here for the third installment of the Women Who Inspire series. If this is your first time popping over, in August The Lucky Lifestyle kicked off a monthly "Women Who Inspire" series featuring a profile of a different woman every month who is -- you guessed it! -- inspirational (and really, what woman isn't? But these ladies are extraordinary!). 

Today I'm SO happy and excited to introduce you all to October's feature woman, Kelly. I have known Kelly since middle school (remember those fun years?), and she is just as much fun and just as hilarious today as she was all those years ago. I've always admired her wit, but these days what I admire most is that she's not ever afraid to stand up for what and who she believes in, as well as the unique combination of strength and vulnerability she possesses when it comes to facing one of her biggest challenges: she recently tested gene positive for Huntington's Disease.

This woman is dynamite. Read on to to find out why, and be prepared to experience all the feelings... and to laugh. You'll definitely laugh.

1. Let's start with the basics! Tell us a little bit about yourself -- where you call home, what you do for a living, and who makes up your family.

I live in Washington, DC with my husband Scott and our dog Margot.  We love being here, it's a thriving city that negotiates power during the week and settles into a cluster of unique self contained neighborhoods during the weekend. There is always something new to learn, cool art to see, and delicious food to eat.

Since moving here in 2011 I’ve had a few jobs, but for the last 5 years I’ve been working in government affairs in the Agriculture sector. Exciting stuff, huh?  Its good work that provides me the freedom to pursue the fun stuff with the remaining 128 hours of the week.

(Photo credit: Oliver Vignola)

2. You are a potter -- so cool! How did you discover your love for making pottery?

In high school I fell in love with the idea I had of going to college to study Fashion Merchandising-It was business but glam! I quickly realized that it was way less interesting and way less glam than I had hoped. I transferred into a smaller school with an arts program and flourished. I was given the opportunity to explore different mediums including clay. I loved the way that I could just transfer my imagination into this lump of goo! It was so fun! Then I spent a few years working in arts administration which gave me a broad view of the pottery process so when I got the chance to take a full blown wheel class, I jumped at it! I ended up taking classes for 3 years and then became a Community Artist at District Clay Center where I keep my studio today.

3. What has your career path looked like thus far? Are you where you thought you would be ten years ago?

Oh man, no way.  I thought I’d be in New York running a gallery and living in a sexy high rise apartment that’s all windows or something. At the time, that mindset was common among my peers, so I kind of just adopted it as mine. After that big change in college though, I just started following my heart all over the damn place! I worked in arts programming and studio management before I moved into government affairs. In the meantime I took up every opportunity for education of any sort that came my way. I’ve taken a ground school class for pilots; a college workshop about the science of electric kilns; and a one day class called Women Run Campaigns, among others.  When you think trajectory-you think flying through the air bypassing all the obstacles on the ground. I used to really just want to fly straight to the top, but now that I’m in it, I love zig-zagging around those obstacles on the ground.

4. Three years ago you tested gene positive for Huntington's Disease, a disease that has taken the life of your great grandmother, both of her children, and five of her grandchildren, including your father at the age of just 48. Can you share what Huntington's Disease is for those who aren't familiar with it?

Huntington’s Disease (HD) is a genetic brain disease that stays dormant until mid-life when memory, cognition, and motor skills begin to diminish. Every offspring of someone with HD has a %50 chance of inheriting it. It is rare and only about 20,000 Americans are diagnosed in some way, but that means an estimated 250,000 others are at risk.

The diagnosis process for this disease is different from many others. If you wait until you show symptoms a test is almost unnecessary, but if you get tested before the symptoms come you just kind of sit in limbo wondering when the symptoms will surface. I am in that limbo right now; I’m gene+ but not yet symptomatic and do not have a clinical diagnosis.

Because researchers have identified the gene, you can be tested any time after 18 years of age regardless of symptoms. I am of the first generation that could utilize this test as they only identified the correct gene in the 1990s. Getting tested might sound like a no-brainer on paper, but there is not yet a cure, nor are there any viable treatments on the market, so knowing the results can be really scary.

There are some amazing trials happening in the UK and Canada with what they call “Gene Silencing.” Everyone has the Huntington gene, but HD+ people have a mutated version. While a normative functioning gene makes proteins that send instructions to your brain, an HD+ gene cannot properly create those proteins. The proteins it makes cannot be interpreted by the brain so it confuses its signals causing uncontrolled movement and clouds cognitive functions. Gene silencing switches the gene off so it stops making proteins entirely. Again, it sounds great on paper but there is still a lot of research (that needs a lot of funding) to be done.

5. In what ways has Huntington's Disease changed your outlook on life? What would you want other people to know about your experience?

Even though it is a rare disease, it has a heavy presence in the families it affects.  HD has been discussed in my family since I was a child, we’ve lost a lot of loved ones. I think that made my own diagnosis digestible for me, because I’ve seen it.  The biggest impact, even bigger than my personal test results, was seeing the way it affected my dad.

When he lost his big brother he came unglued by the reality that it could be his fate, too. By the time he received his own clinical diagnosis 6 years later he had already started showing symptoms-and was working very hard to hide them. He was someone who believed in hard line gender roles, so being “the man of the house” was fused with his sense of self. So when his abilities to be decisive, to lead, to provide all began to fade away he viewed himself fading away, too.

That has colored my outlook for my future, and taught me to view things for what they are now, rather than what they’ll be in the next 5-10 years and beyond. For now I’m rolling with the punches and doing my best to appreciate the bomb ass gifts in my life right now. There are dark days, for sure but they’re manageable because of the awesome support system I have.

My loved ones rallied behind me so hard when I told them my results and have stayed there ever since. Some of my friends got together and made ham sandwiches and raised $400 for research by selling them. Can you believe a ham sandwich could hold so much power? I never could’ve imagined. A different friend joined the Huntington’s Disease Society of America’s NYC Marathon team, and she’s raised over $4000 and will run on November 4, but can fundraise through December 31. You can find her fundraising page and donate, if you'd like and are able to, here.

 

While the disease itself invokes fear, I know it’s superficial. I have such warm giving people in my life who are helping me through this stage and I know will be there for me in the next one.

6. Where can people learn more, and what can they do to help (what questions to ask/not ask, where to donate, how to take action, etc.)?

The Huntington’s Disease Society of America (HDSA) is the best resource I’ve found for information on the latest studies/medical trials. Annually they award grants to HD Clinics across the country under a program called HD Centers of Excellence. They do a great job of stretching the resources to serve the most people in need. If anyone would like to donate to fund that program, the link above for Mallory’s marathon is doing just that. You can also donate directly through their website www.hdsa.org.

Another great way to help is to find a HD clinic near you and ask if they need any control subjects for any research they’re working one. That’s one of the hardest parts about a rare disease is that everyone with the disease wants to get in on the trial, but they can only do it if they have a pool of people with normative brain function to compare to them. Time commitment can vary from once a month or once a year depending on the program, and they just might even pay you! HDSA.org has a tool where you can search on a map by zip code to find the closest HD clinic near you.

By now I sound like a broken record, but HDSA is a great organization. It was founded by Woody Guthrie’s widow Marjorie, after he died from HD. She started it with an ad in the paper inviting other families who have experienced HD to her kitchen table to talk. It is a grassroots movement and continues to operate as a cluster of symbiotic chapters that work with the families in their region. Full disclosure, I am a former President of our Washington DC Chapter and know first hand how impactful their work is.

So for you, the reader who wants to help, you can check out your local chapter, they can always use reliable volunteers. In most regions there are 5k walks/runs, Educational Panels, Galas and brunch events taking place all year round.  HDSA has 4/4 stars on Charity Navigator, including a 100% score on transparency so should you choose to donate money, time, etc to this you can feel good about it.

7. You're currently working on writing your first book. What has that process been like so far? Any tips for other aspiring writers?

I’m writing this book for myself first, it’s a memoir because I want to have my memories documented before they slip away. It has been an emotional process for me so far. So For this specific writing, I’ve found that starting broadly with the Ws of each piece then going back to really dig in on a specific issue is the best way for me to stay focused without forcing it. Even though some of it is pretty heavy, I’m having so much fun remembering things on purpose! It’s still in its infancy though, so I might have to amend this in a few months.

8. You aren't afraid to stand up for what you believe in. Tell us which issues you are most passionate about and what you do to work toward change.

I’ve been a feminist ever since I had to say the word chauvinist in a school play when I was 8. My mom politely corrected my pronunciation, and diplomatically answered my question about what it meant. To which I replied “Who says!?  Who says girls aren’t as good as boys!?” and my balled up fist has been perched on my hip ever since.

I’ve also learned a lot since that day about how it’s not just SOME boys not liking SOME girls, but that there are systems in place at every level of our country to hinder women and girls from excelling. Then I uncovered that systems just like that are in place to disadvantage non-white races of every sex.  

I am always uncovering new context that I had been shielded from during my white suburban upbringing. To support this I’ve marched in protest. I’ve amplified voices of people who are black, gay, disabled, anything that is a perspective I personally cannot have. And mostly I listen to and believe my sisters and brothers when they say they don’t experience the freedom of which America is so proud.

9. What would people be most surprised to learn about you?

I’m actually a lot of fun! I know that a loud and proud feminist with ticking time bomb of a terminal illness doesn’t sound like the life of the party, but it’s true. I love meeting new people and dancing around and just learned how to play bananagrams!

But yes, I try to approach everything with a strong sense of humor because everything in this world is absurd and it is not fair to only give credence to the serious parts!

(Photo Credit: Sarah Schu)

10. What would your ideal day look like, from start to finish?

Wake up with the sun, and snuggle up in bed for as long as I feel like.

Flesh out some ideas for whatever I’m working on and jot down a few new ones.

Go to the dog park and hang with Scott and our great neighbors while Margot gets some relief from our apartment.

Head to my studio to throw some new work, and surprise it’s someone’s birthday and they got one of those cakes from Milk Bar Bakery and they want to share it with me! Make some work, and move some other work along in the process.

Come home and play with the dog and give Scott a TedTalk about the process of the pieces I brought out of the kiln at the studio.

Then I shower and actually use all of the dumb products I own, and get dressed to go out to dinner with Scott, and friends.

We have a reservation (no waiting!) at a new restaurant where I can order whatever has goat cheese on the menu, a bottle of wine for the table and some type of brownie/ice cream dessert to split!

Then get to bed at a reasonable time, and remember to take off my makeup first.

Kelly, thank you so very much for sharing so much of yourself and your life with us! You have no doubt inspired many. If you have any questions for Kelly, feel free to ask them below (and to just say hello!), or send them to helloluckylifestyle@gmail.com.

WOMEN WHO INSPIRE: MEET STEPHANIE

Today is so special and exciting because it's time to reveal our second profile in the Women Who Inspire series! September's spotlight shines on a truly extraordinary woman.

I met Stephanie when I was three years old and we were neighbors living a house apart. Our families became fast friends -- the type of friends that make blood relation pretty irrelevant. We have endured the unimaginably difficult together and have celebrated life's greatest joys side by side. When I dreamed up the series, Stephanie immediately came to mind and I'm so honored she enthusiastically agreed to the interview. Read on, and I think you'll see why...

1. Let's start with the basics! Tell us a little bit about yourself -- where you call home, what you do for a living, and who makes up your family.

Hello! I live in Lancaster County, PA. My husband and I talk about moving back to New England at least once a day, but I really love being close to my mom and having her participate in my kids' childhoods- and I have made so many great friends and connections here over the years! I am in my 14th year working as a gallery publicist and curator for a local art gallery here in Lancaster. I also hold the coveted, exhausting, glorious position of being a mom. My husband Richy and I have been together since we were 19 years old, and we have grown quite the little family for ourselves. Ben is 10, Nathaniel is 9, Ethan is 7, and Ellie is 1 1/2. Our daughter Madeline would be turning 12 this winter, but died just before birth. 

2. In your current role, you're a publicist for an art studio. Can you share with us what your job entails, and what your career path has looked like thus far?

I have always been in love with art and writing, and am so lucky to have a career that involves both. As a curator, I get to seek out artists that move and inspire me. As a publicist, I get to interview the artists and write press releases and articles for them. I also get to coordinate arts events, like a large scale scavenger hunt through the west side of the arts district in our city. I thrive when I am able to be creative and work with the community, so that part is always fun. The very best part of the gig, though, is that for the past few years I have been able to do it entirely from home. It has allowed me to be a stay at home mom while keeping my foot in the door and my brain engaged in a career that I love. Some days (most days... ok, all of the days) I worry that I am only doing a mediocre job at both parenting and work because I am trying to do both simultaneously, but I think that I would still be questioning my abilities even if I had more concrete boundaries between the two. And I just try to remind myself that worrying about these things is simply proof that I care deeply- which probably means I am actually doing alright.

3. You work from home... and you're raising four kids. How do you manage it all? Does the elusive "balance" actually exist? 

Hahaha well, sometimes it feels more like surviving than managing, but we make it work. I honestly don't know if true balance exists. Balance makes it seem like you could hold everything at once in your hands without dropping anything, and for me at least, that just seems overwhelming. Juggling seems a more apt description. In addition to having three boys (in three and half years!), a newly mobile toddler, and a job, I also volunteer at the kids' elementary school, coach soccer, and run a nonprofit organization. It sounds like a lot (and it is!) and I don't mean to glorify busyness, because I do think having unstructured family time is so important, but each of those things I have piled on my plate bring me so much joy. The best advice I can offer for anyone else with a gaggle of children and a cluttered schedule is just to lower your expectations (sometimes the house is going to be messy, sometimes the kids are going to have a bad day, sometimes you are going to have a bad day- that's ok!), focus on the things that matter, say no to the things that just don't fit, and do what you need to do to get through the day. 

4. Your first child, Madeline, was stillborn one week after her due date. Incredibly, you have channeled your grief to honor your daughter, while helping other parents in similar situations, by founding the Sweet Pea Project. Can you tell us more about the Sweet Pea Project?

Sweet Pea Project offers comfort, support, and gentle guidance to families who have experienced the death of their baby during pregnancy or infancy. We donate blankets to hospitals in all 50 states, so that when a baby is stillborn or dies shortly after birth, parents are given a soft blanket to swaddle their child in during the short time they spend together. This blanket also serves as a keepsake after they say goodbye, because so often there are very few tangible items to remember the child by. In many cases, our blankets are the only things these babies have ever touched, which makes them so sacred for the parents. We also donate copies of my two books, and hold community events. We have held writing workshops, poetry readings, and art exhibits, but our two annual events are the ones that stand out. In the summer we hold our Sweet Pea Sisters & Brothers Picnic, which offers guests a well deserved day of family fun. And, coming up right around the corner, on October 15 we hold our Remembrance Gathering. This is a quiet, pretty little event where guests can write little love notes to their children on candles, which we float down a daisy lined stream to the sound of a gently strummed guitar as each child's name is read out loud.

I felt early on that I never wanted Madeline to be the reason I was broken, or unable to live a full life. She was the most beautiful thing that had ever happened to me, and I could not allow her legacy to be the destruction of her mother. Instead, I wanted to focus on helping others and building a community where families were able to honor the full truth of their families- embracing both their living children and the ones who had died. It has been inexplicably beautiful and humbling to watch as that delicate little dream came true over the last decade. It makes me feel like I am still mothering her- mothering her memory- in an important way.

5. You are the author of two books: Still. (2010) and to linger on hot coals (2014). What inspired you to create these books, and who do you hope reads them? 

I wish nobody ever had to read them. But unfortunately, one out of every four women will experience the death of a baby during pregnancy. Those bereaved mothers and the fathers who need to know that they are not alone in this, their families and friends who seek a better understanding of what their loved one is experiencing, and the medical professionals who need an inside look at what their patients go through outside of the physical components that they are tending to- these are the people that I hope find their way to my books. Especially to linger on hot coals, because there are so many voices contained in that collection. My hope is that one of those voices speaks directly to the broken heart of whoever is flipping though the pages, and that somehow, in some small way, it helps make the world slightly less heavy for that one moment in time.

6. What would you tell other women who feel compelled to create something -- whether it be a book, a piece of art, a nonprofit, or something else -- but don't know where to start? 

The best advice I can give is to just do it. Sit down and create it, or stand up and fight for it, make it happen. If you sit too long with the details and to do lists, you can get overwhelmed and anxious. Just run at it full steam ahead while the fire is still burning, and the rest will fall into place along the way. And ASK FOR HELP. Surround yourself with people who believe in you. None of the things that I have done would have been possible without the strong support I received from people who love me. My husband has always been great with just going along with my ideas, probably because he knows I cannot be stopped anyway. And my friend Beth, who is my counterpart in all things Sweet Pea Project, is wonderful at saying yes to even my most feverish ideas, and then sitting down to figure out what needs to be done to make them actually happen. 

7. You are no stranger to hardship or loss. You were diagnosed with a congenital heart defect as a small child that continues to affect your life each day and for which you have undergone multiple serious operations, and your father passed away when you were in your early twenties. How have you faced the challenges and times of heartbreak that have come your way? Where do you find your inner strength?

I allow myself to experience it all with complete honesty. I feel like, in our culture especially, people are so quick to want to help you heal, to put the sadness behind you and move on. I understand that the desire for that grows from love- nobody wants to see someone that they love struggling in agony and despair- but sometimes you just need to sit with that sadness, acknowledge it, experience it, allow it to be. If you just push it down or ignore it, true healing is never going to be attainable. And when I speak of healing, I don't mean a magical type of healing where you end up feeling "all better" at last. I mean the real kind of healing, where you have to relearn how to walk and the scars remain etched into your skin forever, and sometimes it aches a lot when it rains, but you have grown accustomed to it, and you have reinvested in the world, and you feel lucky to be here, living this life with contentment and gratitude.

8. You have also experienced much joy -- the greatest of all being motherhood. What's your favorite thing about being a mom? 

I don't know that I could nail that down to just one thing- or even just one paragraph. As exhausting as parenting is, there really is nothing in the world that could have fulfilled me more. I have loved every stage so far. There is nothing better than holding a brand new person who you grew from scratch inside your body. And there is nothing better than hearing that little person start putting silly strings of words and actions together. Last week my 1 year old took off her shorts, handed them to me, and said, "I don't want to pants." I love it. There is nothing better than adventuring with your kids as they get older. My 9 and 7 year olds and I went zip lining and did a high ropes obstacle course together last week. It was fun and challenging and such a cool thing to do together. And there is nothing better than sitting with my incredible old soul 10 year old and having deep discussions about everything under the sun. His brain and compassion and ability to understand the world amaze me. I could go on and on about everything I love and appreciate about journeying through life with these people. I am so very lucky.

9. You are an activist. Tell us which issues you are most passionate about and what you do to work toward change. Are the kids involved? And if so, how?

I realize how lucky we are, and that we did not earn it. And I think democracy only works when the people get involved. There have unfortunately been a plethora of things to stand up against lately, and I have brought my children along for all of them. I think it is part of my job as their mother to not shield them from the truth, but also not scare them, so we have lots of long talks about everything and I let them ask questions. Truthfully, though, I think it comes a lot easier to children than it does to adults. They don't get bogged down in the politics behind things, they can clearly see what is the right thing to do without worrying about the red-tape involved. They have a lot less questions than you might think. And they make signs that are profound in their simplicity, and prove that they just get it. The last protest we went to was for family separation. It was insanely hot that day, and my husband was out of state for the weekend, but I couldn't not go. I packed up the kids and our signs and we went out there to sweat together, because if those were my children being ripped from my arms, I want to believe that others would take to the streets for us. And I think it is important for my kids to see that, the crowds of people standing together as a community, standing up for what they believe is right and good and necessary. It shows them that even when things are happening that seem terrible, there are always good people willing to stand up and speak out. It gives me hope.

10. What would an ideal day look like for you, from start to finish?

A day spent traveling and adventuring with my family is always my favorite kind of day. We actually had a pretty ideal day just the other Saturday. We had breakfast and then drove out of state to go hiking. We hiked for a couple hours and climbed to the top of a waterfall. Nobody fell in, so that was a little miracle right there. Afterward we went to a brewery on a farm. They had a food truck and a bunch of goats and those pretty dangling lightbulb lights and a fire pit and tons of space for the kids to run around. We were able to be entertained and relaxed at once- which I would say is probably as good as it gets when you have four children. The kids read in the car the whole way home (I am so lucky to have kids who are such great travelers because we do a lot of long trips in the car) and when we got home it was late and raining, so the kids all went to bed and Richy and I ordered in Chinese food and played Mariokart, our classic stay in date night.

Feeling inspired and a bit in awe? Me too! Thank you, Steph, for so openly sharing yourself with us -- I know every one of us is better for it. If you'd like to learn more about Stephanie and the Sweet Pea Project, please visit www.sweetpeaproject.org. Click here to check out Stephanie's book Still. and here for to linger on hot coals. AND if you're within driving distance to Lititz, PA and would like to register to attend (free!) the Sweet Pea Project's annual Remembrance Gathering on October 15th, click here to register.