Sister Sister: An Update on the Girls

Thursday, October 19, 2017

I can't believe I have an almost four year old and a 15 month old. Two daughters. Two little girls who are alike in some ways and oh-so-different in others. 

I thought I'd share a little update on each of the girls, survey style, since time is flying by at a speed I can't quite wrap my brain around. But first, an update on sisters.

It's the coolest thing to see C and H growing into their roles as sisters. C as big sister, and H as little sister, with all that each of those titles entails. Yes, C is somewhat "typical" when it comes to being the older child: she likes some semblance of order and can get pretty miffed when H comes charging in like Babyzilla (if you've seen her in action in real life, you know!). But she's gotten good at dissolving frustration into a fit of giggles while proclaiming "She's just the silliest, mom! She's a rascal-y girl!" I can't help but laugh, too. 

And H also embraces her role as youngest by testing her sister every chance she gets. She likes to take toys and watch C for her reaction. But, man, does she adore her big sis. The first thing she does when she sees her is lean in for a hug. 

They really adore each other. They are at ages now where they are starting to play together instead of separately or side-by-side. They make each other laugh -- sometimes over the silliest things -- and Steve and I just look at each other, like we're on the outside of some inside joke. I pray each and every day that their bond just continues to grow and strengthen. I think they're off to a pretty great start. :)

Carrington, 3 years 11 months

Carrie is nearing her FOURTH birthday, and though I can hardly believe it, it shows. She attends preschool three mornings a week this year and jumped back into the swing of things without a hiccup. She has and shares pretty complex thoughts and asks a lot of good questions. 

SIZE: Wearing mostly size 4t with some 5t, and 9.5 shoe

LOVES: Little sissy, play dates with her friends, gymnastics, swimming lessons, her trampoline, playing picnic/tea party, playing doctor, hide and seek, playgrounds, her trampoline, playing pretend, kinetic sand, legos, books

DISLIKES: Not being able to do something, having her hair brushed

FAVORITE FOOD: Any fruit, raisins and almonds


FAVORITE TV SHOW: Peppa, Mickey, Doc McStuffins

FAVORITE MOVIE: Toy Story, Frozen

WANTS TO BE: A doctor, a mommy, and the other day she told me a firewoman

Hadley, 15 months

Hadley is equal parts snuggly and spitfire, runs wherever she goes, loves to eat, and has the sweetest little heart. She is SO active!

SIZE: Wearing 18-24 months clothes, size 4 shoe, size 4 diaper

LOVES: Copying everything her big sister does, babies, dolls, animals, running, jumping, climbing, dressing up, shoes and accessories, the playground, music, dancing, getting her teeth brushed

DISLIKES: Getting her diaper changed, sitting still for books

FAVORITE FOOD: Any fruit, peas, macaroni and cheese

FAVORITE DRINK: The only two drinks she has - milk and water, but loves both!

SAYS: mama, dada, puppy (pup pup), cheese, belly, please, baba, bye bye, hi, ow

SLEEPS: 7:15pm - 7:15am with two naps, both about 1.5 hours

It sounds cheesy, but I look at these two girls every day and feel so very grateful that they are here, that this is my life. I am living my greatest dream each and every day, through all of the challenging and tiring and amazing. 

Yes, Me Too.

Tuesday, October 17, 2017

One of the goals I had when I started blogging was to not only post about the fun stuff (weekend recaps, style, kid stuff, etc.), but to also touch on the tough stuff. It's one of the reasons I wanted to focus on the word lifestyle. Life -- real life -- isn't just Target runs and toddler tales. Sometimes things get messy and hard, and I don't want to shy away from that. I think we can talk about it all. I think we should.

With that said, I'm sure you've noticed the phrase "me too" trending on social media in response to the recent Harvey Weinstein news and, I think, current administration. If you haven't, women (primarily) are encouraged to post "me too" to demonstrate the magnitude of sexual harassment and assault. On my own news feed, I've seen several women post so far. I've also seen a few people say they'd like to see other hashtags and trending phrases from men, instead of putting the burden of publicly revealing/reliving a painful experience on women to make the point.

But, of course, the ugly truth is: almost certainly, each and every woman can say "me too."

One of the things I got fired up about after the Weinstein scandal broke were those calling out his victims, crying "Hypocrites!" "She should have reported him!" "She allowed him to harass/assault that many more people!" I thought, wait. Wait a minute. This power hungry, obviously disturbed man does this and people are calling out his victims? Color me confused.

Yes. Yes, we should talk about it. In an ideal world, we should each report every verbal or physical assault. But the truth is, a lot of life happens in the grey areas. Some victims of sexual harassment and assault are not yet women: they are girls... children. They may not understand for years or decades what has happened, or they may simply be scared. Some women don't want to -- cannot -- lose their jobs. Most of us fall into that grey area. We think, well that felt uncomfortable. I don't want that to ever happen again. But who do I tell? Will they believe me? Sexual harassment belittles us. In the moment it occurs and beyond, it whittles us down to feel like nothing more than something (not someone) for a man to look at.

So what do we do? I don't have the answer, but I think we start with tucking our pointer finger in when it comes to telling those on the receiving end of this how they should have handled it. I think it begins with hearing and believing that this is a real problem. I think it involves us raising our children to see and learn well the meaning of integrity and respect for all. I think it entails building work environments and, eventually, a society where the consequences lie in the behavior, not the reporting of the behavior. It means standing up for those who may not feel safe enough to stand up for themselves. It would be heartening -- and I believe, crucial -- if among those standing up for and beside women were men.

And no, not every man is to blame. And yes, men are sometimes also on the receiving end of sexual assault and harassment. I hear and believe each of you who says you have been through this also, whether you shout it or whisper it. 

And yes, me too. More times than I can count.
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